Adventures with the Many children, Part 3. What works, what doesn't.

There are some things we have learned over our long road trips that make things easier with the masses. I have divided them up into lists here. 

Take it

-Two coolers. We save gobs of money by buying food from Costco and local grocery stores. I get as much already prepared food as possible (soups or bagged salads or bars or sushi rolls!). Have gallon size ziplocks for when the ice melts and you find your butter floating.....

-Audiobooks that we download on Overdrive from our local library FOR FREE and headphone splitters for both rows. We used phones, old phones and iPads for listening devices. Headphones themselves are ridiculously expensive, especially for the littles. We found some comfy $5 ones in the Target dollar section. And when June and Marcus ripped off the jack, I didn't have a heart attack because it was not expensive!

-Brightly colored organizing folder with all confirmation pages printed out and in clear sleeves. This came in handy because there was hardly any phone/internet coverage the entire time, even when it appeared we had a wifi signal. We would have been lost without my trusty itinerary notebook, especially when we drove into Badlands at 8pm, and there was no one to check us in or tell us our site number. 

- I love love love ebags for packing. We use their packing cubes and their TLS Motherlode Weekender and the Junior version of that bag. I can send you a discount code if you are interested. The packing cubes and only having to take 3 suitcase-type bags saved our sanity on this trip. 

- Do laundry along the way and bring your own small container of detergent. We felt we packed light but we still could have packed less because we did laundry a couple times. 

- In the clothing department, I felt like a total genius this time by not giving each kid their own packing cube to rifle through. Instead I put all the long pants in one cube, all the underwear in another, etc. So, this meant that we only had to open a couple packing cubes instead of 5 to get dressed depending on the weather. Loved this. Also, we don't worry about PJs when camping, we just put our kids to bed in what they will wear in the morning. 

-Go shopping for perishables closer to your destination. While I love saving money by bringing coolers full of food, if we have a long day or two of driving to start the trip (like always!) then we do eat fast food along the way so we don't have to deal with coolers at hotels on the road. We wait to do our big grocery shopping until our biggest city near our destination. This time it was Billings and Costco carried local favorites like Huckleberry Jam and Wheat Montana Bakery bread, so that was fun.

- Melatonin. Chewable strawberry so the kids sleep in new locations without a big fight. 

Leave it

- activity books/sticker books and the like. We have found these to be a waste of money and super irritating in how the back seat is COVERED in stickers and half used crumpled books. We did take some pads of paper, markers, etch-a-sketch and a few picture books for the littles. Otherwise, we did audiobooks and occasional movies on the iPad. 

-Heavy Coats/gloves. We bring layers and stick hands in pockets. We brought winter hats and really we should have just made sure each kid had a hoodie for warmth and a cap for sun exposure to eliminate extra stuff. 

-French Press. We brought this and felt dumb because I saw Starbucks Via at Costco on the road and grabbed that instead. Less hassle!

- Fancy "camping food" aluminum foil packets that require lots of chopping. I gave these up a long time ago. I find it waaaaay less work to buy more prepared foods (hello, chicken sausages from Costco) than I normally would so that camping is fun for me and not just meal prep. 

- Leave behind the clothes you don't like for you and your kids. Sounds weird, but vacations are prime time for photos. I know I have some photos from previous vacations where I regret having the one child dressed in ill-fitting stuff or stained, etc, because we love to display these photos. 

Wish we'd had it

- National Park Passport book. We bought these for all the kids this time and I was totally sad we didn't have stamps with dates from all our previous National Park adventures for a keepsake. 

-Binoculars for the kids

-More hydration packs- We liked OGIO better than the kids' camelbak for additional storage and for ease of filling. 

-Hot cocoa in bulk (instead of the expensive 10 packs from the gas station)

- Maps. Not having a 3G or 4G signal meant we were lacking in the map department!

So, there you go. If you have questions, let me know. Big trips with kids CAN be done and are great fun to boot.  

Wild Adventures with Kids, Part 2. Grand Teton National Park.

After three quick nights in Yellowstone, we headed to GTNP to meet up with Andrew's parents for 4 nights. We stayed at Headwaters Campground and RV sites at Flagg Ranch. We made the reservations through Grand Teton, but this place was actually located on the John D. Rockefeller Memorial Parkway that connects the two parks. It was a beautiful area, but I don't think we will stay in this location again. We spent most of our time driving south toward Colter Bay and Jenny Lake. One benefit of Headwaters, though, was the ability to make reservations ahead of time instead of being first come, first served. That was helpful this time, since we had two groups to coordinate.

Hiking buddies at the String Lake picnic area.

Ruth and Byron got to go with Daddy to Colter Bay for a couple evening ranger programs to get signatures for their Junior Ranger badge.

Our first hike was labeled as easy, though Oma and the kids begged to differ. It would have been a pretty easy hike if we weren't busting it to get out of the frigid wind and rain that started up the last mile. This hike was the String Lake loop. I especially wish we could have gone rock-hopping where the bridge crossed between String and Leigh lakes, but the storm was brewing at that point. 

Do you see the rain drops on my lens? It is funny that you can't tell it's raining, but it definitely was!

Our second day, we hiked Polecat Creek in the morning up near Headwaters. It was a beautiful hike, and a bit warmer. 

Polecat Creek hike crosses over a stream that runs off from a hot spring. If you look closely, you can see the stream is actually steaming! It was pretty incredible to lean down to touch the water and find that it felt like a hot tub.

We got them all looking at the camera- yay! Too bad that for 75% of photos Eli refused to smile. Goober.  

Ruth tickled Eli for this photo. Smart girl.  

My favorite place was Colter Bay.  

Another Colter Bay. I think next time, I would choose to stay at Colter Bay as it's in the north part of the park, but much closer to everything than Headwaters. 

We ate dinner at the Colter Bay picnic area. I totally recommend it. 

The Colter Bay picnic area has a trail right down to the beach of Jackson Lake. This was my favorite time in Grand Teton. Marcus has asked to go back several times. 

The kids throw rocks in the water like it's their job. 

We call them "the twins."

This beauty was such a helper. Having she and Byron to help with taking little kids to the bathroom was seriously a massive game-changer on this trip. We really appreciate them. They were rewarded for their efforts by getting to do "big kid" things like the horse ride and secret evening swims at the hotels we stayed at when the little guys went to sleep. 

Andrew and I  got away for an evening while Oma and Opa took care of the kids. (Thanks Oma and Opa!) We took a dinner cruise from Colter Bay to Elk Island in the middle of Jackson Lake. This was the view from right next to our picnic table. 

I highly recommend the dinner cruise. It was so much fun, very informative and the food was incredible, and all cooked outside on Elk Island. This was a highlight for sure. 

On our last day in the park, we drove down the eastern road in the park from the Moran entrance to the Moose entrance. Don't miss this road. It has the BEST view of the Teton Range.

 Then we went to the LSR Preserve. When you read that the parking lot is full by 10 am, heed that warning and arrive EARLY. Unlike other places in the park, there is no extra place you can park there and the road isn't wide enough to pull off and park there. Thankfully, we had some extra drivers (thanks, Opa!) who could sit with the car in line and get a spot when someone left. The benefit of the parking situation is that it eliminates the hoards of people and makes hiking here contemplative and peaceful. Above you see tranquil Phelps Lake, which is 1.3 miles from the visitor center. 

Our brave hikers, who managed to be relatively quiet, in the spirit of the Preserve. Ruth and Byron stayed back for the Interpretive Center with Oma and Opa. 

Fantastic trails at LSR Preserve and you could hear a bubbling brook for some of it, which was delightful.

 The morning we left, Ruth and Byron were sworn in as Junior Rangers in GTNP. We took our time getting to Gillette, WY that day so we could have some time to get clean, swim and relax before the long trek home. We stayed at Holiday Inn Express there and it was the best one I have been in. They catered to kids and were super sweet overall. 

From Gillette, we visited Devil's Tower National Monument, along with about 1000 bikers who were headed to Sturgis for the motorcycle rally. That night, we spent a quick night at Badlands NP in Cedar Pass campground. We will need to go back there to see it more fully,  as it was beautiful. 

This is the last day of the trip. Can you tell? This photo began a very long day driving through South Dakota and Minnesota. 

Wild Adventures with 5 kids, Part 1. Yellowstone NP.

At some point, we decided that having children wasn't going to stop us from going on adventures. We went to Zion National Park when Byron was 3 months old and have tried to keep it up since. It is always crazy and it is always worth it. We have found that the two go together and we must get out there and experience the crazy and stressful to enjoy the beautiful.  Our latest adventure was to Yellowstone NP and Grand Teton NP.  We were in the parks for 7 nights total. It wasn't long enough. Either park could easily take a week or more by itself. Here are the Yellowstone pics and I will share the GTNP pics in the next post.

The Beartooth Highway enters the northeast corner of Yellowstone and was called the most beautiful drive in America by Charles Kuralt. We don't dispute it, though it's awfully hard to choose when America has so very many gorgeous drives. 

Me, on top of the world on the Beartooth Highway, which reaches almost 11,000 feet at its highest point. 

We spotted a group of mountain goats walking in a line, so we parked and hopped out to see them more closely. Doesn't this look like a scene from The Sound of Music?

Someone got a ride from Daddy. June was possibly our least complaining adventurer and hiked many miles like a champ.

Obligatory bison-induced traffic jam photo. Can't leave Yellowstone without one!

We stayed in Grant Village Campground on Loop I, right next to Yellowstone Lake. This was a great loop to stay in as you can access the lakeshore by foot in less than a minute. Grant Village is about an hour drive from both the Grand Canyon of the Yellowstone and Old Faithful. It's also less than an hour to Grand Teton. 

The fantastic thing about kids who wake up early is that you get to explore in the golden hour when few people are awake. Yellowstone and "few people" are not usually in the same sentence, so I cherished my early morning photo walks on the lake. 

Old Faithful Inn, as seen from the boardwalk trail.

Grand Prismatic Spring trail. 

Frog hunting (they did find one!) at Grant Village Campground.

The pelicans were also up early. 

Site 312 in the I loop. This was a great place for our family because we were right next to the bathroom, which made it much easier for littles. 

The three musketeers and I checked out the Grand Canyon of the Yellowstone while Daddy took a horse ride with the kids at the Canyon location. 

We found the skies to be absolutely incredible. 

Byron on Casino and Ruth on Cheyenne after their 1 hour trail ride. This was their favorite  part of the trip, along with becoming Junior Rangers and getting their patches.

 We managed to have some relatively quiet moments at a very busy park as you can see in most of the photos. However, here is a great example of what the roads are like if you a) are near the main attractions b) are behind someone who spotted a moose/bison/imaginary animal and stopped in the middle of the road to take photos or c) are caught in construction traffic. 

Never say never

I completed my first Isabody Challenge earlier this month. It was a great experience for me, focusing on my health this last 16 weeks. I was able to lose 16 pounds and gain greater clarity about my health and goals. I also feel like it gave me confidence to dream again in all areas. I also decided to get over my fear of what people think about at home businesses and actively tell people about it- to pursue this as a legitimate business, because it is. I am so so glad that Carolyn shared about the benefits she received from nutritional cleansing. It has kept me afloat during some crazy times.

Part of the Isabody Challenge is writing a short essay on why you decided to participate. Here is mine. I hope it gives you a good idea of my heart behind this business.

 My life is a little bit crazy. I am a mom to five children, three through adoption and two biologically. They are all between the ages of 4-9 and two of them have significant special needs that affect our daily life. Our most recent adoption rocked our world as our daughter was older and has Down syndrome. It was a big transition and truthfully, we weren’t handling it well. I felt defeated in all areas from mothering to physical health. The Isabody Challenge was, for me, a way to prove to myself that I could rise above the demanding circumstances of my everyday and that I could thrive.  

The biggest thing I have gained from digging into this challenge is to realize that if I put my mind to something, I can make change happen. Physically, I have made a transformation I never believed possible. I have more muscle than I have ever had and am amazed at what I can achieve with consistent positive choices and conviction. One day I realized that this transformation physically means that I can transform in other areas. I so deeply want to be a person who exudes joy and spiritual vitality. Seeing that my body can change helped me leave that place of defeat and pursue being the person I long to be. It also helped me truly believe that I can impact change elsewhere.

One of my mottos in life, “add to the beauty,” comes from a song by Sara Groves with the same title. There is so much that is truly heartbreaking in this world and we have the opportunity to enter in and bring light and life to places that need it. There will always be difficulty and injustice, but we have a choice in how we respond to these things. Do we let darkness prevail and lay down in defeat, or do we choose to use our unique gifts, personality and resources to make our world a more beautiful place? Before I began using Isagenix products, I lived many days with headaches and fatigue. I had no energy and no clue how I was going to keep up with my life and I certainly didn’t have energy to think about living out my passions. Isagenix changed all of that for me and I am so thankful that another mom shared it with me. I am committed to also sharing these solutions with others. So many people are living each day exhausted, not able to be the vibrant people they long to be because their physical body isn’t keeping up with their heart’s passions. I want to see this change for as many people as possible. I want to see more people full of energy to love their families and meet the deep needs of the world by doing what they are uniquely gifted to do. The world needs each and every one of us to add to the beauty. 

On Not Giving Up

I have lived various parts of my life from a place of defeat, especially in regards to my health.  I would try to make changes and make goals, but inevitably would fall back into poor habits of eating too much sugar, drinking too much caffeine and double that when I was stressed. Then I would just give up the goals and do whatever I felt like. I always liked the excuse of being pregnant so that I could eat whatever I wanted and say I was eating for two! These habits just resulted in sluggish, puffy me with headaches, grouchiness, stomach upset and the blues. After Katya's adoption fell through, I spent a lot of time crying and eating too much Ben & Jerry's fro-yo. (It's healthier! You can eat more before you feel super guilty... right??!) This also didn't do me any favors in the mood or energy department.

In April of 2013, a couple moms I knew who were also pouring out their lives in large adoptive families started raving about how they did a cleanse and had tons of energy. I was intrigued by the energy and simultaneously suspicious of network marketing. I knew enough about these ladies to know they weren't trying to become salespeople because it wasn't their style. I was desperate to feel better and cautiously signed up for a year of discounted membership to purchase the nutritional products they were using. I paid for a 30 day cleanse by allocating some of our grocery budget since the products were food and the shakes were to replace 2 meals a day during the month. I did a 30 day cleanse in May of 2013 and kicked my coffee habit and my desperate need for naps (while buying a house, packing, potty training, starting an adoption and celebrating several events with special food). I lost 13 pounds with little to no effort because I was getting rid toxins and giving my body nutrition it needed. It took me about 2 weeks to decide I loved the way Isagenix made me feel and that I wouldn't be without it for this crazy journey I'm on.

Though I kicked the coffee habit, I wasn't able to kick the sugar habit. After June came home, I was back to my stress eating habits and downing whole containers of cookies and gained the weight I lost a year earlier right back. Not good and not healthy. Not who I wanted to be. It wasn't the weight so much as the reality that it conveyed: this adoption and being a mom of 5 was kicking my butt. That made me mad. I don't want to survive my life, limping til the end. I want to thrive and have more to give a world that needs light and hope. How could I do that if I had given up on my own health in defeat?

I joined the YMCA last summer, and just hung in there. I got a bit stronger doing Body Flow regularly and it was good for stress relief (the free childcare didn't hurt either. Truth.) I don't know exactly how I decided, but another one of those crazy adoption mamas I knew told me about an online trainer who helped mamas like me get their physical and mental strength back (or for the first time?) The program is laid out in a step by step way with at-home workouts and a simple meal plan. The plan was compatible with Isagenix, making it even simpler to implement for me. I started in November, just in time for a lot of holidays! Strangely enough, I looked more fit after the holidays than I did before them. The plan was working, so I kept it up because I felt awesome.

I have made some huge strides in my body composition in the last 6.5 months since working with Carol Elizabeth. I do squat jumps, I lift weights. The bigger strides have been in my thinking, though. I don't feel like I'm fighting a losing battle. I am no longer addicted to sugar. I'm not stuck in the cycle anymore. I get up early. I am nicer to my children! I so want other mamas to get out of their own negative cycle and finally make steps toward vibrant physical and mental health. It would be a privilege to share the stuff I have learned and see other people get free of their defeated thinking and feel better.

 If you are tired and stressed out, please consider trying Isagenix for a month and see how you feel. This is health and fitness for normal, real people. I am not a good cook and I hate burpees. I have a lot of small children and spend hours on the phone each month trying to take care of services and appointments for my kids who have special needs. If I can do this, it is simple. Promise. It's not about the scale, either. Losing pounds is great, but it's not really what it's about. I weigh the same in the two photos below, but in the right one (with my eyes closed and my awesome stray hair) I am in jeans that are a size smaller because I have gained a ton of muscle and I fit better in my clothes. If you would like to see what Isagenix is all about, I will give it to you straight. Good products sell themselves so I don't feel the need to "sell" to anyone. I LOVE to see people succeeding in their goals and getting out of the barely surviving pit. Please join me if you dare :)

Special Needs & Older Child Adoption, One year out from the Mom's view

Part of me still feels like I am reeling from a spinning teacup ride. One year ago we were in Jinan, meeting our 5th child.

She is not our youngest child, but as the others grow she will become the baby, for always. We went in faith, not really knowing what any of this would mean. For example, we didn't quite grasp that bringing June into our family would mean that instead of developmental twins, we would now have developmental triplets. Here are my triplets- different ages, same hair color, same shoe size and similar developmentally... all about the age 3. (Insert emoticon with eyes bugging out. That's my favorite one.)

What this meant for us was that I potty trained two kids this year. We watched a lot of Bubble Guppies, Dora, Diego and Kai Lan. We put up a fence in the backyard so they wouldn't run away. There was much adjusting (read: screaming kids, poop accidents, crying kids, pee accidents, crying mom, coloring on walls and selves, screaming mom) to be done.

There were lots of firsts (first mudpuddle!) and 3 pairs of glasses. Moms of kids with DS from China, please contact me before you buy glasses.

There were two surgeries, three sleep studies, and countless doctor appts... for one kid. Then there were the other four. I gained 10 lbs (boo to stress eating) and lost them again (yay to Isagenix and Carol Elizabeth). I spent many a moment sitting in the corner of my kitchen counter hiding from the children and just catching my breath a bit. And eating Ben and Jerry's half baked fro-yo, thus the weight gain problem....

Despite all of this chaos, I can attest to the following: 

People are kind and want to help. Some even fly to China to help you and carry around your new kid when you run out of strength. My parents and friends held down the fort while we were in China- no small task. We received so many delicious meals when we came home. God has brought some dear dear helpers into our lives (here's a shout out to Katrina and Wendy!) who have literally rocked my world by caring for the kids with no judgment, just love. Many precious friends have listened, so graciously, to my hard and varied emotions. 

Children are resilient. The ways that June has transformed in the last year, through the total upheaval of her life, is nothing short of amazing. She takes each day as it comes and accepts us and loves us as her family without question. She has learned how to act like a little girl, rather than someone who lived in an asylum or frankly, like an animal. Her orphanage was one "of the good ones,"  but when she came home, she was so deeply disregulated so much of the time. Chaotic insane laughter, popping hips, grunting, no self control and just.... weird. She tries her darndest to use her words now and just carries herself so much more like the 8 year old she was meant to be. 

We are resilient and God will grow us through difficulty. I'm not sure that I can describe what this looks like exactly. I know that I am actually cooking real food again on a regular basis, and exercising, and starting to write more, and painting sometimes. So, I know that somehow, even though it doesn't feel like it some days, I am resilient. And that even if it feels like we have a long way to go to reach our new normal, we are no longer in total crisis mode. 

Scheduled breaks help you not burn out. Truly, I'm not sure where I would be if we didn't build in time to keep ourselves and our marriage healthy. For us, this looks like: a Y membership (free childcare!), biweekly date nights, yearly respite trip for Andrew and I, good nutrition, help with cleaning and making an escape from Minnesota winter for a few weeks. We have been able to do several of these things with the help of our CSG (Community Support Grant) that we have through the state due to June's disability. MN moms of kids with disabilities, feel free to contact me about this grant. 

I will leave you with my favorite quote from lately, from an unexpected source, but totally applicable to this journey: Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength. - Arnold Schwarzenegger